Broken Words
by illtellyoumysins
Summary: New at this. Only a few chapters coming. Regina/David. Set after 4a finale. Some things are changed. I own no character.
1. Chapter 1

_I will always love you. Just not today. Not in this moment. I cannot._ Those were Regina's exact thoughts as she ripped up that single page from the storybook that was never written. Robin and Regina: fated to be together. Aligned by the stars and confirmed by tattoo and fairy dust. That single page that made it seem like it would get better. That there would be hope. When in reality, is not true. Things will not get better. There will not be hope. No quarters will be paid today.

Regina could feel the eyes on her as she turned. Stared down by those who are close to her true love. She knew what their thoughts were, "_Poor Regina._" She knows that she is doing the right thing. She just couldn't understand why it had to hurt this bad. It felt like her own heart crossed that line with Robin. Promised a life of love and hope, but cursed to never return to her.

Regina was able to get back to her car, turn around, and drove straight to her safe haven. Her vault. That's when she lost it. Sobbing, unashamed by the feelings that she could no longer contain. She slammed her hands against the small table, flung her gloves and jacket to the floor. She closed her eyes in an attempt to calm herself. Regain any sense of reality that she could. She took a few shallow breaths. _"I choose you, Regina."_

Dammit.

Her heart was pounding so hard she could hear it in her ears. Every pump tunneled through her body, almost in mocking. Her face was flushed and sweaty. Everything felt so raw. This was unfair.

That's when she remembered. _I don't have to feel this way_. Regina slammed her hand into her chest. She could feel her fingers tighten around her pumping heart. It was almost hot to the touch. Signs of it working harder than it needs to. She twisted slightly, felt a pop, then pulled out.

The relief was instant. As Regina placed her heart safely into a small box, she drew in three deep breaths.

One: "This feels better."

Two: "Who needs love? Just keep that box away."

Three: "I need a drink."

After a few moments, Regina finally felt like she could see straight. She walked slowly to the mirror (which once held visions of the woman who stole her love away), and touched up her make-up. Painting her face for a moment, drawing lines and coloring lips, made her feel almost human. She slipped on a pair of jeans, a sweater, and tall boots. With a flick of her wrist, she was just around the corner from Granny's. Once nice thing about magic, no drinking and driving record for Regina. Magic while drinking only sometimes ends up bad.

As Regina reached the door of Granny's, she quietly said a prayer, hoping no Charming or Swan would be there to help torment her. She only wanted to drink in peace. Wallowing in self pity, injustice, and a small amount of shame. When she opened the door only to find Grumpy alone in the back corner booth, Regina was relieved. She walked to the bar, sat down with a thump and her shoulders weighing heavily, with a sigh, she simply said to Red, "I would like drink, and I would like them to keep coming. I would not like my cup empty tonight. Got it?"

With sympathetic eyes, Red replied, "Of course, the Grumpy special." She smiled kindly and both women heard a mumbled response from the booth behind her.

Regina paid no mind as soon as her glass was placed in front of her. She tipped the cup up, up, up, and then it was gone. She turned to see Red placing another in front of her. Regina nodded to the young woman and her eyes directed toward her drink._ "Why am I doing this to myself? How could I have let him leave knowing I could never see him again in this town? How could I be so stupid?"_

Midnight was rearing it's ugly face. Regina and Red were the ones left in the only bar in Storybrooke. Regina simply stared at her drink, pretending not to feel Red's apologetic eyes on her. She had a few down and the room was spinning. The last time she was this wasted was the first time Marian came back. Healing with booze is the best medicine. Especially when there is absolutely nothing that can be done.

Regina released a heavy sigh and placed her face into the palms of her hands. That's when she heard it. The ding of the door opening. Regina ran her hands down her face, and felt the presence of someone in the seat next to her. She knew what was coming. The speech. The hope speech. She was fully expecting Emma when she turned her head, but was completely surprised.

Turning to see Prince Charming was not at all what she expected. "David, what are you doing here?" Regina knew that Emma or Snow had sent him in an attempt to salvage what little hope that she had left. David and Regina had always had an odd relationship. It was her hatred for Snow that had driven her wild back in the Enchanted Forest. He was just her enemy's partner in crime. It's not his fault he had to fall for that wicked wench.

_Stop, Regina_. _This isn't you anymore. You have worked so hard to get over whatever feelings you had for Snow. Do not let your sudden heart break dampen your recovery. You have too much to prove to your son. You have too much to prove to yourself._

Good thing Regina didn't have her heart or that little pep talk might have worked. She felt anger burn at her throat with the words she spat toward him, "Look, I don't need to hear what you have to say. I did what I needed to do. For _Marian_." You could almost see the bitterness roll of of her tongue. Regina took a hefty swig on her 5th drink of the evening (unknown how many shots have been consumed either, all she knew was, Red hadn't cut her off yet.)

"Wow." David's reaction was nothing close to stunned. A simple bow of his shoulders and nod of his head was all the verification she needed to know that he heard what she said. "Someone is rather raw."

It took everything that Regina had in her power (magic and all) not to slam him off of the chair and through the front door to Granny's. "Excuse me?"

David seemed as if he regretted his words as soon as they left his charming mouth. "Regina, I didn't mean it as an insult. I just simply meant I wasn't here for you. I mean, sure if you wanted to talk, I'll listen, but you are not the reason I'm at the bar requesting a drink."

Regina watched him carefully as he nodded to Red. "Bring another two of what she's having, please."

Reeling herself in from her small, selfish outburst, Regina looked down at the hands that had so recently been holding Robin's, her fated love. Her fated curse. Her never, ever, happy ending.

_Curious_. Regina focused on any feeling other than anger or sadness or gut wrenching pain. Glancing in David's direction, she noticed how sad he looked. Not nearly as upset as she, but none the less, very disturbed by something. "Well, are you going to sit here in silence or am I going to have to ask you what that look on your face is about?" She spat in his direction. She tried to soften her tone, but knew it was of no use. He had, in fact, known her for a long time, and knew that she was not very good at hiding and covering her anger. Especially when it came to losing someone she loved. She shook the thoughts of David and Robin out of her head as soon as he started speaking.

"Snow and I fought tonight." He said plainly. "During the curse, we said things to each other that were forgiven for a moment. A split second. But as soon as it came up later, ya know, it's hard to not remember what the love of your life said to you in their worst moments."

Regina couldn't help but laugh shallowly. "Hah, David. Do you not remember that Snow and I were fighting. With swords. In the POLICE STATION? Did you even see what I was wearing? C'mon, if you guys are fighting over what you said to each other, I fear Mary Margret will come chasing me down the street before dawn." Her cheeks were warm as the liquid courage flowed through her bloodstream. This newfound small smile on her face, and a different emotion running through her body was fresh. Even though no heart was in her chest, it was nice to know that someone was having as shitty of a night as her. It is an absolute shame that someone else's pain was something that seemed to bring her comfort. Using the swiveling chair at the bar, Regina turned toward David. Having been at the bar for a few hours, doing nothing but drinking and wallowing, Regina's movements were sloppy. She spun a tad too far toward him and her knees bumped into his upper thigh. Regina was instantly embarrassed. No need to be, she wasn't interested in David. But a slight touch, even the most innocent, at the right moment, can be deadly. Regina muttered an apology, but David shook his hand toward her and finished his drink in three swigs.

With a smile, Regina finished hers as well. "David, it's never good to try and play catch up. No need to try and out drink me." She was feeling her buzz. And she was feeling good. No thoughts of the day that proceeded this drunken evening, and even though she was no longer alone to her thought, she was happy that he didn't want to talk to her like Swan would have. This wasn't a night of girl talk and sleepovers. This was a night of drinking. And who would've known it was a night of regrets as well.

...

"Whoa whoa whoa, slow down there, Chief." Regina said as David lightly pushed her against her vault door, hands at her hips and breath on her neck. The world seemed upside down, topsy turvy. All she knew was, the prickle of his 5 o'clock shadow at her throat was everything she needed. His hands were on her hips, and on her back, then under her sweatshirt in an instant, so fast she wondered if he had an extra pair tucked away somewhere. "David," She said with a laugh into his ear, "Let me open the door at least."

She gave no care about who saw or who judged. All she knew at this moment was, Red saying, "I don't care where you go, but you can't stay here." Regina was sure that Red was sick of hearing the two adults at the bar, giggling like school children. Gently mocking the hope, and the vigor of his wife. Without a heart in her chest, it was easy to tease and mock something she lacked: love, hope, a husband, a happy ending. Without a heart, it was easy to make decisions like using magic to take David and her to the outside of her vault (the only place she knew where she could keep drinking and not be bugged by anyone. No one dare bother her in her time of grieving.) Without a heart, she had no regrets. She knew that half the "sheriff squad" was now in her vault, pulling at the base of her sweater.


	2. Chapter 2

_Drunk_. That's about the only word to express how Regina and David were feeling in this moment of bad decisions. Regina has no heart. Literally. Nothing in her body to tell her this is wrong. Nothing in her chest to pull her to the surface and tell her that what she was doing is unforgivable. Something that could ruin a family and something that could ruin all the progress she has made. Then again, it takes two to tango. That's probably the only thing that is justifying her actions.

The two had finally made it past the door and down the stairs. Regina felt light on her feet. They were almost doing a dance, spinning and tugging. David's back was facing the same mirror she was staring at before the bar. David's mouth was working down her neck, and in one quick motion, had her sweater off her body. The air had a chill, there was no noise other than the heavy breathing of the trouble makers. David's mouth started moving down, down her neck, into the crevasse of her breasts, until he was on his knees kissing her stomach.

Her senses were heightened. Every kiss felt so hot against her body. The feeling was so intense and a nice change from the many emotions she was feeling earlier. Hatred, sadness, anger, now filled with lust, weakness, and excitement. Regina gasped sharply when David began to roll his tongue across her stomach. She closed her eyes and tossed her head back. Her head rolled to the side and she opened her eyes.

In an almost sick synchronization, just as David was undoing her pants, hands heavy with anticipation, Regina's eyes moved across the scatter of pictures sitting on her shelf. The first: a picture of Henry. One when he was younger, his first day of 3rd grade. He was so young. Changed so complexly to the man he is now. Forced through change to adulthood with curses, dangers of death, kidnapping. Poor kid. _All of it my fault._ The second picture: Her and Robin, one she stared at for too many minutes, hours. Robin's hand close on her face. Regina closed her eyes and felt the hot, stinging burn she knew too fondly of lately. One of her hands was on David's shoulder and one she brought to her cheek. Placing it softly where Robin had held it just some hours ago.

Regina's chest was tight now. It was getting hard for her to breath. Just before David tugged her pants down, she pushed his shoulder away, "David, hold on." Regina backed away, taking a single step. Just far enough away to see herself in the mirror. With a flick of her wrist, magic flew out of her finger tips, and froze David in his place, on his knees with a very confused look on his face. Giving her a moment to regain herself. She looked into the mirror. Her dark hair was messy on her shoulders, many fly aways from their previous make out session. She wore no top, just her black lace bra contrasting against her pale skin, (o_ne she had put on in preparation after her conversation with Marian about Robin "choosing her". Hah, whatta joke) _and her jeans. Jeans that were now unbuttoned, displaying her matching black panties. Regina brought her hand to her mouth, staring into the mirror with tears in her eyes. "What am I doing?" Her own voice startled her.

Forcing herself to turn away from David and the mirror was easy, but turning to see the box that she had placed her heart into earlier was not. She walked to the shelf that held her pictures and the organ she took from her own chest. Regina was still spinning and drunk. She tipped open the small box that held her heart. She gently ran her fingertips over the bright red. She ignored the small hint of black in the center, hoping that it originated from this night of bad decisions and will go away with time.

At this point, Regina had tears streaming down her face. _How can I be so stupid? He fought with his wife, didn't get a divorce, isn't separated. We are both taking advantage of each other, and it's not fair. Nothing is fair._

Regina walked back over to David, she knelt down to him, ran her palm along his cheek. She gave him a kiss on his forehead, magic flowing through her lips to his brain. Magic giving him a story of laughing with Regina at the bar until Red kicked them out, and he left and went home to make up with her enemy. A story where he nor she was a villain who made bad decisions.

And with a flick of her wrist, he was gone. No memory of her vault, no memories of their lust and desire. In an instant she was alone. Drunk and alone. _Just as it should be._


End file.
